As December slips into January, there is a distinct sense that, like a snake who sheds its skin, one can somehow shed themselves of their outgrown (sometimes quite literally 😉), unwanted self for the skin of a fresh, new hope and beginning. I suppose some people might feel this way on their birthday, but birthdays are typically associated with wishes, not resolutions.
This past year started with one of the largest, deepest dives into the underworld of MS that I have experienced thus far. There were times I felt like I didn’t have the breath to hang on until I broke the surface for a life-infusing gasp of even a few good hours strung together. I wrote about this experience back in February in my very first blog post, The Ocean. As hard as it was to get through, the benefit was intimately feeling the presence and comfort of God in profound ways hitherto unknown to me. I didn’t make a resolution for 2019 to be a year of spiritual growth, but as a direct result of how hard it was, it turned out to be exactly that.
Resolutions denote a need for a change and a conscious effort to make the change happen. I’ve made a few New Year’s resolutions over the course of my life with varying degrees of success. They have always been about things over which I have control, like losing a few pounds, exercising more, being more circumspect about what I say, reading more and watching less TV…the usual stuff.
This year, 2020, marks my 30th anniversary of living with MS. After my initial diagnosis, and except for a couple of relapses, the first 10 years were relatively, blissfully easy. I had absolutely no concept of what it would eventually be like to live with MS as my daily parasitic sidekick. Sometimes, even now, it still surprises me by how far down its tentacles have reached into my life.
Most gratefully, as 2019 progressed, I recovered enough to have some good days sown in among the bad. This too was a lesson from God about gratitude and hope.
The lessons learned and the spiritual growth God has blessed me with will serve as a lifeline, like pure oxygen, to whatever the New Year throws at me. So, I resolve to take each day of 2020 as it comes, resting upon the One who created time but is not bound by it.
I hope you take the time to look back over your experiences of 2019 with a view to how God has worked in your life. If you don’t see Him there, then there’s no better time to invite Him to share not only 2020 with you but the rest of your life! Get in contact with me and I will gladly help you get started.
May God be with you in the new year, my friends!
Amy's Axons 