God’s Attributes

One of my favorite Christan authors, Merrill C. Tenney, who was Professor of Bible and Theology at Wheaton College in Illinois, wrote a book titled, Galatians:The Charter of Christian Liberty.  Within it he explained and applied ten different approaches to studying the meaning of Biblical text “so that the reader can imitate the procedure and thus have the joy of making discoveries in the divine revelation.”  Over the course of the past two years, I have applied these strategies to four different books of the New Testament and found them to be like a key that has unlocked beautiful treasures of incomprehensible wealth.  

I just finished my journey through Romans and would like to share my new found favorite component within one of these methods, the “Theological Method.”  This method includes going through the book and finding all references to God’s personality and attributes, Christ’s personality and attributes, the Holy Spirit’s personality and attributes, and then the specific instructions for what Christ’s churches as well as each individual Christian’s personality, attributes, and behavior should be in order to reflect the Godhead. I found this particular exercise hugely beneficial, faith-strengthening, and awe-inspiring.

The following is a list of the attributes I found describing God’s personality and who He is as I read through Romans.  You can easily follow along, if you wish, by reading Romans yourself, since I wrote this list in chronological order as I read through the book.  If a particular attribute or personality trait was mentioned more than once, I did not repeat it on the list. However, several of His revealed traits were stated in slightly different contexts so I included them on the list.

God’s Personality and Attributes:

God is a promise-keeper

God is Father

God loves us

God witnesses our works

God has a plan for us

God made the gospel as the power for our salvation

God is righteous

God is wrathful against wickedness

God has made plain His truth

God made His invisible qualities evident through creation

God is eternally powerful

God is divine by nature

God is full of glory

God is immortal

God is truthful

God is creator

God is to be forever praised

God gives us over to wickedness when we defy Him

God made the knowledge of Himself evident

God makes righteous decrees

God is judge

God is kind

God is tolerant

God is patient

God leads us

God is wrathful

God is Giver of eternal life

God is angry at evil

God does not show favoritism

God sees

God has a relationship with us if we have faith

God is to be honored

God speaks

God entrusted us with His Word(s)

God is faithful

God is true

God is available when we seek Him

God is to be feared

God is the giver of grace

God is forbearing

God is just

He is God of Jews

He is God of Gentiles

God is the only God

God is to be trusted

God is to be believed

God credits righteousness to us through Jesus Christ

God is our guaranteeror

God gives life to the dead

God raised Jesus from the dead

God gives peace (We do not have to fear judgement)

God gives hope

God poured out His love to us through the Holy Spirit

God loved us while we were still sinners

God is to be rejoiced in

God gifted grace through Christ to us

God has given us an abundant provision of grace

God makes us alive to Him once sin dies in us

God is the One to whom we bear fruit

God is our master when we die to sin

God sent Christ to be a sin offering for us

God is our Abba, Father

God is the giver of true freedom

God works for the good of those who love Him

God has foreknowlege 

God predestined that we be conformed to Christ

God has called us

God justifies us

God is for us!

God chose us

God has loved us with an inseparable love

God does not fail

God has a purpose for His children

God is merciful

God is compassionate

God hardens whom He wants to harden

God formed us

God does not reject His own

God answers

God is stern to those who fall

God grafted Gentiles into the branches of Israel

God’s gifts and calling are irrevocable

God has bound all (at some point) over to disobedience in order that He may have mercy on us all

God’s wisdom is deep and rich

God’s knowledge is deep and rich

God’s judgements are unsearchable

God’s paths cannot be traced

God has made all things from Him, through Him, and to Him

God’s will is good, pleasing, and perfect

God gives us a measure of faith

God avenges

God repays

God established earthly authorities

God’s kingdom is of righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit

God gives us endurance

God gives us encouragement

God gives us a spirit of unity

God gives joy

God will crush Satan under His feet

God is wise

I hope this has encouraged you as much as it does me.  Perhaps you can use this technique yourself as you read through scripture in order to get to know God more completely.

May God’s blessings be upon you.

Recovering From A Family Visit

Hello again. It’s been a couple of weeks since I last posted. Hubby and I enjoyed hosting family the past couple of weeks. The last one went home early this past Saturday afternoon. I have been so tired since that, outside of going to see my Dad for Father’s Day and attending church Sunday morning, I’ve not left the house. I thought about writing yesterday but thoughts were slow to come. The blank screen just stared back at me no matter how long I stared at it.

My brain feels a bit less hazy today. I decided to try and lube the wheels with a few purposeful thoughts to scatter the entrenched cogfog.

The MS monster roared and paced around the perimeter the whole time we had company. Thankfully though, it waited to pounce and begin devouring me alive until the last couple of days of the visit. I’m actually fairly proud it took that long because it means I paced myself for a whole two weeks🥳.

Anyway, this short post proves I’m still alive and kicking. I hope to be able to write again someday soon, I’ve missed it.

Godspeed,

Amy

I Want To Ride My Bicycle, I Want To Ride My Bike

I have had several “good days” in a row over the past few weeks!  They may not have been anyone else’s definition of a “good” day, but to me they were. I have always tried to exercise in some shape or form each day for the past 26 years. For many years now I have been confined mostly to walking around the house for as long as possible before having to sit and rest.  Once I have recovered, I walk around again, rest, and so on. My hubby is an avid cyclist and I have at various times tried to ride with him. I start out doing okay, but inevitably wear out in spectacular fashion because I refuse to listen to my body when it starts to get tired.  As a result of my own stupidity, I end up having to stop riding for weeks or months.


In fact, the last time I dared to ride a couple of years ago, I became so utterly undone by the endeavor it took three solid months to come back to a baseline similar to the one I had previously.  After that, I promised never to do that to myself again and put my bike away in the deepest, darkest, corner of the garage. Like someone lost in a foreign country and unable to speak the language, I just couldn’t understand that I could do more over time by slowing down or stopping before inevitably self-imploding.
I follow several MS related research websites and have recently noticed an uptick of studies related to exercise and its effect upon disease progression, regardless of which type the participants had. Of course, exercise doesn’t stop MS progression and disability, but it does have a positive impact.  People who exercised to their fullest potential, even if wheelchair bound, retained more physical skills for a significantly longer period of time than cohorts who didn’t exercise on a regular basis. That got me thinking again about riding my bike.


I’ve certainly noticed a decline in my overall stamina, coordination, and balance for several months, despite my regular efforts to walk around the house.  I’ve also heard myself repeatedly telling my husband how jealous I am of him being able to ride. I got to thinking maybe I should push myself to try cycling again. So, with a healthy dose of trepidation, I put my courage to the sticking place, and pulled my cobweb covered bike out of its long confinement, put some air in the tires, and set off on a short ride.  I managed to get around our block five times in ten minutes before feeling the tug of tiredness. Yay for me!


Feeling encouraged, over the course of the last few weeks I’ve managed to slowly build up some stamina and increase the range I ride. I’d forgotten how delicious it is to feel the breeze on my face, to smell hay and wild honeysuckle in the air, and to hear the choir of various birds singing and chirping from electric lines and treetops. I’d also forgotten how it feels to get my heart rate up, feel the burn of long unused muscles, and enjoy the rush of endorphins when finally finished.


There have been days when I’ve only been able to ride for a few minutes. For example, my ride this morning was abbreviated because fatigue set in pretty quickly.  I had a feeling I wouldn’t make it long since my legs were already heavy and slow to respond to the demands of walking. However, two days ago, I was actually able to ride for 37 minutes!  Perhaps you saw or heard about Kayla Montgomery in the news a few years ago. Kayla’s a young track star who runs races despite the fact MS has left her unable to feel her legs. When the race is over, she collapses into her coach’s arms unable to get up or walk for several minutes or hours.  Well, that’s pretty close to how I am after each ride. It requires a lot of resting before moving on with my day and attempting to conquer other tasks like cooking or folding laundry. I’m trying not to be afraid of what will happen in the future with my MS. I’m going to do my best from day to day trying to obey the constantly fluctuating whims and fancies this dumb disease dictates because I want to be able to continue to enjoy the ride for as long as possible.

Alive, Though We Sleep

I lost my Mom 3 ½ years ago.  The combination of Mother’s Day and Memorial Day makes May a particularly tough month for me.  Sadly, the last few months have been full of loss for several of the people I love. Some have lost spouses, others children, as well as parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, nephews, nieces, and cousins.  A few have in quick succession lost combinations of special people from this list.

Grief is strong.  It can make us feel like we have been imprisoned within its walls with no window for light and no hope of escape.  Regardless of whether you believe in God or not, we all live our lives knowing we and our loved ones will one day die.  For those of us who believe in Christ and His promises, we pray our daily prayers in anticipation of death, and we sing songs of joy about how wonderful the moment will be when our faith becomes sight.  

Even so, when death comes to our loved ones it rocks our world right down to its very foundations.  All those songs of joy and all those prayers offered in hope suddenly mingle with the sting of pain, sorrow, anger, fear, regret, denial, or despair. We’re lonely.  Death seems so final.

How do we go on?  How do we ever feel happiness again?

Christ speaks of death as “sleep”, something you will wake up from, not an everlasting state.  Remember before He raised a young Roman ruler’s daughter from the dead, He told all those who had gathered to grieve the family’s loss, “The girl is not dead but asleep.” (Matthew 9:24)?  Again, about Lazarus, he told His apostles, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up” (Jn 11:11).

Christ was about to perform a miracle that not only proved He was sent from the Father (vs 42), but also demonstrated in a physical reality the spiritual lesson that we live beyond death.  Four days after Lazarus died, He went to the town where Lazarus and his sisters lived. He then revealed a truth to Lazarus’ sister, Martha, that continues to this day to fill the heart of every Christian with hope.  John 11:25-26, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die.” As both a demonstration and a confirmation that He had the power over resurrection and life, “Jesus called out in a loud voice, ‘Lazarus, come out!’.  The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.” Of course, Jesus went on to manifest His ultimate power over death and the ability to give spiritual life when He rose from the dead of His own accord (Matthew 28:1-15; Mark 16:1-14; Luke 24:1-32; John 20:1-18).

Every book of the New Testament has this truth as its cornerstone.  Paul in particular expounded more deeply upon this idea of death as “sleep”.  In I Corinthians 15:20-22 he wrote, “But Christ has indeed been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep.  For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead comes also through a man. For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive.”  Again, in I Thessalonians 4:13-18, “Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord’s own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air.  And we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words.”

Matthew, Mark, and Luke all record Christ as saying that God’s children “are children of the resurrection” and “In the account of the burning bush, even Moses showed that the dead rise, for he calls the Lord ‘the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.’  He is not the God of the dead, but of the living, for to Him all are alive.” (Luke 20:35-38). We also know the apostles Peter, John, and James saw Moses and Elijah talking with Jesus during His transfiguration, as again recorded in the three gospels indicated above. Moses and Elijah were not dead, but recognizably alive!

In Romans 14:7-9 Paul beautifully summarizes why we as Christians do not need to be afraid of death, feel sorry for those who have died in the Lord, or as quoted from I Thessalonians above, “grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope”.  He wrote, “For none of us lives to himself alone and none of us dies to himself alone. If we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.  For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that He might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.”  Alive or dead, it just doesn’t matter.  Despite the fact we humans can’t see beyond death God does.  He sees His children both here on earth and those in heaven as the same thing – alive!      

I keep these wonderful promises tucked away in my heart.  I hope they bring as much comfort and joy through sorrow to you as they do to me.

To the praise of His glory!

Survey Says…

I hate to brag but I’m a pretty important person. No, seriously.  And you should be a little worried. Here’s the lowdown.

Around late February of this year, after my reluctant but necessary full retirement owing to MS, I decided I was going to need something to do at home to keep me from going completely doolally.  If you’re reading this then, for better or worse, you know the fruit of one of my endeavors – blogging. As much as I’d like to say I’ve thrown myself into writing and have become seriously self-disciplined, the mood actually only strikes once in a while.  On a cheerier note, I’m probably not far from being a serious, internationally-ranked Spider Solitaire contender.

Obviously, I needed more.  Something important that would better humanity.  An avenue that would leave a lasting, positive imprint on the lives of others.  So, I joined Survey Junkie.

Every day my opinions shape your world.  I answer for the masses about real-world, important things, like what we really want from our toilet paper; the best logo for an underwear brand that captures the qualities of “durability and comfort”, the “two things we all want” from our undies; and have carefully chosen between proposed TV commercials to guarantee that the ad fairly represents the company’s commitment to keeping you “safe” while also making you look “prosperous”.

Some survey questions have been easy and fun, for example: Do you use slang?  Fo’ sho’ At what age do you think it is no longer appropriate to you use slang? 89, ‘cause my Grandpa always said he was one cool cat who wasn’t afraid to get on the horn to coppers when he saw someone on the hooch who needed to go to the big house. Did you now that most people think anyone over the age of 26 should not use slang?  Dude, that’s heavy.

Some questions have taught me that OCD has a functional side. Which restaurants have you or anyone in your household visited at least once in the last 12 months? One moment, let me just whip out my Alphabetized, Annotated, and Ranked by 5-Star Rating System of Restaurants Visited Between May 2018 – May 2019 list.

Some questions have been grouped into blocks and straddle between a screening test for Dementia and a social awareness questionnaire. Have you purchased potato chips within the last three months? Are you judging me? What brand(s) of potato chips have you heard of? What brand(s) haven’t I heard of?! Is it important to you that the company who made the potato chips contributes to better their community?  You mean frying potatoes and/or corn into thin, tasty wafers doesn’t count as bettering the community?Would you consider changing the brand of potato chips you normally purchase if you knew a different company made more of a commitment to reducing their carbon footprint than your current chip company? What?  I can’t hear you over the crunch of my Fritos.

Today I took an eight minute survey that was top secret.  I had to agree that I would not reveal the name or contents of the survey among my friends or family, nor would I share anything about it on social media platforms.  See, I told you I was important. I’m doing classified work.

Not only is my opinion important, but valuable too.  In the last two months I’ve earned $22 and counting. The word is out that my opinions are great because I get between 10-15 offers a day to participate in a new survey.  I guess you could even say I’ve become a professional at my new gig.

I’ve always known MS had a few perks, like getting to park in handicap spaces and sitting in reserved areas for my wheelchair at stadiums.  I didn’t know that the virtually home-bound state it has left me in would one day lead me to this new and exciting career in the world of surveys.  It just goes to show that every cloud really does have a silver lining. Oh, I gotta go, someone needs my opinion about which font on the wrapper of mini candy bars properly conveys the rich, creamy chocolate within!

Guilty as Charged

I tend to be a rule follower and a planner.  I obey authority figures. I respect laws. I’m the annoying person who reads all the directions, twice.  I look at maps before heading somewhere new. I lay out my clothes the night before and meal plan at least three days ahead.  In other words, negative consequences are generally a sufficient deterrent to keep me on the straight and narrow. Well… almost always.

Sometimes a person has an obligation to disobey, and in a calculated, planned coup, rage against an authoritarian, oppressive regime, even if the result is certain defeat.

In this spirit, I make the following confession: I, Amy Renee, did purposely, and with a full understanding of the probable outcome, defiantly spend 15 minutes weeding the landscape in the front yard on the afternoon of April 27, in the year of our Lord, 2019.

Statement of Reason: The landscape was rife with nefarious weeds that had invaded upon my property.  On the date in question, the sun was shining and the sky was a beautiful, clear blue which did beckon me forthwith to act upon the foreign invaders.

Defendant’s Previous History: The defendant has a long history, dating back 29 years, of rebellion against the established rule of law, specifically related to over exertion.

Sentence: As the indicted has, of her own admission, willfully and knowingly acted against the long-standing, acting, dictatorial powers of Multiple Sclerosis, she shall be sentenced to between three days to two weeks of excessive fatigue, difficulty walking independently, embarrassing clumsiness, and intermittent loss of bladder control.

The court would like to ask the defendant how long it will take her to learn her lesson. “Probably forever, your honor.” It certainly seems so. Court dismissed.

Shopping at Full Speed

Its bright red concentric circles beckon to land me squarely in the store. The aroma of freshly made popcorn and your choice of hot or cold, legally addictive, caffeinated beverages magically combine to infuse the air and make you feel like you want to stay a while.  It provides ample opportunities to people watch a slightly trendier, but still as strange, menagerie of folks than it’s yellow-sparked logo competitor. At any given time, it probably has more tattoo and pierced skin shoppers with hipster haircuts than any other place in town.  Home goods, furniture, clothes, undergarments, electronics, books, toys and games, food, candy, lotions and potions, a pharmacy, cleaning products, pet supplies, seasonal decor, greeting cards…pretty much everything a first world, middle class, 21st century human needs to function in our consumerist society.

I used to be able to drive myself to this shopping mecca and make my way through any aisle I chose at a leisurely pace.  When my cart was full and I had breathed in all the buttery-laced air I wanted, I could stand around in the check-out lane with no worry of how long it would take to pay, walk back to my car, and put all the bags in the backseat before finally driving home.  I could also bring the bags into the house, empty the contents, and, one by one, put them away into their respective places without care for how much energy I expended.

That was then and this is now.

It’s been well over three years since I dared to make this excursion on my own.  Like so many other things when living with MS, doing activities on my own didn’t abruptly stop.  My independence diminished similar to how individual flurries accumulate in a gently falling, long, slowly moving snowstorm.  Flake by tiny flake they collected until one day I found myself buried under the avalanche of symptoms, and shopping on my own became yet another task that fell into the “insurmountable” category.

Nowadays, my hubby chauffeurs me into town and parks in one of the handicap spots conveniently located close to the door.  He drags my wheelchair out of the trunk and together we spin our way through the store. I hate riding in those motorized wheelchairs with a basket on the front that beep every time you need to turn around or want to see something behind you.  Instead, I’ve learned the art of balancing two handbaskets on my lap, fitting everything we need into them for the week. More difficult still has been learning to compromise and change our individually-preferred shopping styles in order to make our weekly Target run pleasant for both of us.  I’ve (mostly) given up my insistence that he push me at a leisurely pace through each isle of my favorite sections. In turn, he has (mostly) stopped whizzing me so quickly that we leave two-wheeled skid marks on the tile. Sometimes we settle on him leaving me in one aisle near something I want to look at while he flies through two or three other aisles.  

This approach has fairly easily carried over to other shopping venues like the grocery store and DIY stores.  Someday I hope it will overflow into shopping for clothes at department stores, but I’m not holding my breath.  I have to admit that watching someone else shop for clothes has a limited entertainment value. However, it is kind of fun to ride through the rest of the mall so fast that you can’t tell if the blue-haired people you pass are teenagers or grandmas!

Completed!

The shower project is finally done! It took four additional weeks to finish beyond the originally estimated three, but it looks great and works even better. My favorite part is definitely the little corner seat, it’s made bathing much easier for me when I am tired. (See pictures below.)

Allegedly, the bedroom carpet install and stretching of the closet carpet is scheduled for this Thursday. Just two more major pushes to go and everything will be back to normal! I guess we will be moving everything from our bedroom to the living room Wednesday evening then turning around to move it all back in Thursday evening. Even so, the light at the end of the tunnel is gleaming brightly. It will feel good to be able to use our closet again, too. We will never again take the small, convenient creature comforts of home for granted.

The fixtures were in about a week and a half before the door and window glass were installed. It was a long wait!
The fixtures are an easy reach from the seat.
The door and window were the final pieces of the puzzle.
The window adds some extra light and some bonus space on the sill.
The inaugural shower was wonderful!

Freedom, My Old Friend!

Crushed on the couch because I got dressed. My legs are telephone poles, it’s going to take a Mack-Truck to move them. Each arm is a 500 lb bar-bell. The remote is just a couple inches away. My brain keeps saying “reach out and get it” but nothing happens. I can’t sit up, I can’t even raise my head. It takes all my energy to blink my eyes. My mouth is open, too slack to close and it takes all my concentration to muster enough energy to swallow. One hour down, now three. I can hear. I can see. I know I am breathing. I can’t feed myself, maybe in the next hour. My chin itches but I don’t care, I’m too tired to scratch it. It’s four hours now. I think I can move my hands. Yes, but my fingers aren’t strong enough to push the buttons on the remote. Maybe 30 more minutes will do the trick. It was all noise before but now I can make out the words from the music playing on TV. I like this song, I don’t need to change the channel. Todd pulls me up so I can sit. Easy does it. Just enough energy to feed myself. The drink is too heavy to lift, but I can sip through a straw. I have to lie back down to rest. Two more hours pass but at least I can follow the plot of the show Todd’s watching.

MS Fatigue is not the same as being tired. You are tired when you expend a lot of energy, like overworking in the garden, or when you don’t get enough sleep, such as pulling an all-night study session before a test. MS Fatigue has nothing to do with sleep or overwork, it is present no matter what, and it is so oppressive no amount of will-power or positive thinking exerts any difference over it. It takes you and holds you prisoner in a nearly unresponsive stupor, virtually catatonic. Sometimes the excessive, paralyzing, worst form of fatigue enters and exits daily. Other times, it comes and goes like a distant relative you only see on holidays or special occasions. I hate it. I don’t have the vocabulary to explain it. I dread every time it visits. It doesn’t wait for invitations, it just shows up and demands an audience. I’ve been under it’s stern, cruel rod of chastisement more times than I can count. It doesn’t get any easier, BUT I know it won’t last forever. It will eventually ease and, though it may seem reluctant at first, let go of it’s vise-gripping, soul sucking, strangle of me and let me breath the air of freedom again.

(Inhale) Freedom, (exhale) my old friend!

MS Walk 2019 is in the Books

It turned out to be a BEAUTIFUL day to take a walk, a very special kind of walk. There was a huge community turn out for the MS Walk, full of friendships both old and new. Several friends from church got together and created a team, Amy’s Axons, in my honor without me even knowing about it! Owing to such a kind and loving act, the walk this year was extra meaningful to me.

Highlights included – the Central High School Kilties marching us out as the walk began, Hurts Donuts, Einstein Bagels, lunch catered by Los Cabos, a variety of vendors raising money for MS, and a live band, just to name a few.

It’s always encouraging to see others living with MS supported by friends and family on their teams. I had the opportunity to meet a couple of people who also have MS. Both of them, like me, stressed how much they relied on their friends and family support in order to live with this disease. This fact can never be emphasized enough, without the help and kindness of others I would be unable to live on my own.

Many advances have been made in recent years in the quest to understand and treat MS. A recent report revealed that the number of people living with MS in the USA was around a million, nearly twice what had originally been thought. Now, more than ever, we need to find a cure!